[video] WRITING CONTEST RESULTS - "A Winner Must Be Chosen"

[lieutenantantichrist]

Well boys and girls, we got us some results. Lemme see here.

[Blake clears his throat with suitable drama as his Snubbull solemnly hands him an envelope.]

Thanks Steve. Third place and one thousand of the weird-ass local money goes to-

[Rip. Unfold]

Number 13, Ryner Lute, with some kind of fairy tale thing about why you should never let a mime run the government.

Second place, with a prize of five thousand rubles or whatever the fuck, is-

[Rip rip]

Number 2, the one about a little girl getting turned into a mime and somehow nobody gets arrested! It's a good day for mimes, and you bet your ass that's never been said by anybody before. That one was by- [Blake squints at the name] The Joker? Does Batman know you're running around here?

All right, drumroll!

[His Solrock rolls around in a circle to approximate it. pattapattapattapatta-- -tear!]

First prize, 7500 pesos and a date with a weirdo, now belongs to Number 7, the long thing about every single damn prompt cause there's always that kid! Nuhnaymi Chee-ack-eye, step right up!

Now, the special categories. Each of these gets their own chance to go bowling with a lunatic and talk about your pet ghosts.

Most Likely to be True goes to Number 12, some household cleaning tips by Kenneth Elm...Alm...Amelie-- Archibald? Hey, Ken, why didn't you ever tell me your name was Archie?

Now, last but not least yadda yadda yadda, we got Funniest. That is Number 8 and its artistic interpretations, by a landslide. Heather Mason, come on down. Hope you don't want the original of that one part back. I, uh, lost it. [In a fire.]

That's it for whatever the hell this was. [Blake leans back with a satisfied air.] Everybody who got cash, it'll get wired straight to your account. Heather, Archie, and Nuhnaymi, give the paper a ring and they'll set up your dates. Congratulations, and all that crap. I'm gonna go get a beer and do something that isn't reading.

[Steve blows on a noisemaker. It goes toot.]

[[OOC: The writing contest is over! The way voting worked is each vote for first got a story 3 points, a vote for second counted as 2, and a vote for third counted as 1. Big thank you to everyone who voted, everyone who participated, and to the mods for a) letting me do this, b) helping me set it up, and c) going above and beyond the call of duty in providing prizes.

lullabytes, enjoymyatelier, and foolishwren, please come down to this thread to pick your NPCs!]]

Comments

[lieutenantantichrist]

[Blake perks up with interest]

Who? We got some fraud going on here?

[tearsofademon]

Rose, my Clefairy...

[lieutenantantichrist]

One of those little bubblegum wad things wrote this?

[...]

Those can write?

[tearsofademon]

She mostly taught herself. I gave her a little help when she asked, but... ahhh, she's way too smart for her own good sometimes...

[lieutenantantichrist]

...didn't know they even had thumbs.

[tearsofademon]

Close enough to them, at least. Not that she'd probably let that stop her even if she didn't.

[lieutenantantichrist]

Determined little gumwad, huh. Seems like she did pretty good for you, though.

[tearsofademon]

Yeah, guess she did. Which is why I'm going to have to think about how to talk to her about this later.

[lieutenantantichrist]

To somebody who made you some free money? Try starting out with "thanks."

[Not a word that comes out of Blake's mouth for his own sake real often, but it's great for other people.]

[tearsofademon]

[Ryner is spared from having to come up with a reply immediately, because...

"Fairy!"

Here's the author, climbing up to his shoulder to see what he's doing. He reaches up to pet her.]

Ahh, speak of the devil...

[lieutenantantichrist]

[He eyes the little pink thing.]

What did you just call me?

[tearsofademon]

["Clef?" She tilts her head.]

Ahh, this is Rose. Rose, this is the guy you sent your story in to.

[lieutenantantichrist]

[Blake's just gonna let that slide by.]

Hey, little blob. Looks like you got you some fans.

[tearsofademon]

Enough of them to get third place. Not sure how you did it, but good job, Rose.

["Fair??" Rose's expression just lights up. So much. She did that well?!?]

[lieutenantantichrist]

[The thing looks all excited. Blake waves.]

Not bad for something that can't speak English. Hell, I have half-expecting I'd get at least one that was just "meow meow meow meow."

[tearsofademon]

Yeah. Even if there are a few things we're gonna have to talk about...

["Clef?" Innocent Clefairy is innocent. Ryner just kind of gives her half a Look.]

Yes, really. I swear, sometimes I wonder if meeting Ferris was actually good for you...

[lieutenantantichrist]

Yeah, just keep her from any more identity theft and you'll be fine.

[Confusion creases his brow.] Ferris? Who's he, a guy with a wheel?

[tearsofademon]

Ahh, no, Ferris... she's my traveling partner back home. She was here a few months a while ago.

[lieutenantantichrist]

Weird name. [At least it's pronounceable.

He jerks his thumb at the pink blob.] She taught this thing how to write?

[tearsofademon]

I hope not. Rose taught herself most of it, I think. But Ferris has an... interesting vocabulary.

Let's just say the "perverted Mr. Mime" thing was definitely her fault.

[mostly]

[lieutenantantichrist]

[Blake appraises the blob with new eyes.] I didn't know these animals even understood that kinda thing.

[Wads of bubblegum with faces aren't supposed to know what perverts are.]

[tearsofademon]

I don't think she really does. You know how she didn't even bring it up again after mentioning it once? If she actually knew, you'd think she'd have made more of a big deal about it. I think she thinks it's a compliment.

["Clefairy?" Rose looks at Ryner - you mean it's not? But Miss Ferris called you that all the time.]

[lieutenantantichrist]

That's a relief. I don't wanna know how the birds and the bee-monsters work for these things.

[He looks to the pink puffy thing.] Work on your vocabulary, all right? Then you'll be ready for next time.

[He hastily amends] If there's a next time.

[tearsofademon]

["Clef!" Rose holds up her hand in a salute. She'll do her best!]

I'll see what I can do to help her out with that.