lieutenantantichrist | [22] [Video/Action for Goldenrod] - "I Know a Lot About the Law and Various Other Lawyerings"

[Though Blake is standing in front of a blank wall, the height of the roof and his distance from the camera hints that he's in a large building. He clears his throat and begins his address.]

Listen up, all of you. I'll make this quick.

[He clasps his hands behind his back and starts moving. He can never stay still while giving a speech like this.]

United States of Monster Island, it is time to get your shit together.

[As he walks, the Croagunk-held Gear revolves to track him, revealing that the wall has a large patch in a different color, and that something further back and to his right appears to be bowling lanes. A few feathers are scattered on the floor.]

First off, as you can see here, we got us a headquarters here in Goldenrod now. You got a problem, you come here.

The second thing we have is a problem.

See, there's an asshole out there trying to commit acts of terrorism and take shit over, and I for one am not planning on letting him.

[He shoots a hard look at the camera. A feather drifts against his foot.]

If you're over eighteen, consider yourself drafted. Man or woman, it doesn't matter when it's a magic animal doing the work. Stand ready to get called up.

[He notices something stuck to him. He scowls, grabs the feather off his pant leg, and brandishes it at the camera.]

In the meantime, somebody clean up these goddamn things.

I've been doing some calling around. It turns out a Center in the Sevii Islands went incommunicado at just about that time that moron was swaggering around bragging about taking one over.

Your assignment is to take your flying and swimming monsters and scout out the area. I'll be sending my bat, too. We find this idiot, then we make him regret who he screwed with.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Yeah, he doesn't have common sense holding him back.

[That's a good question.] It didn't look like it. Better approach the perimeter carefully anyway. Even the dumbest crackheads sometimes wake up long enough to post a lookout.

I was thinking more behind the scenes. If he has friends in high places, they'll just keep tugging him out when things get too bad or supplying him with things like that floating fortress he made.

You think there's somebody backing him.

[It's a troubling idea that hadn't occurred to Blake. He'd figured they were dealing with a lone loony, but somebody providing resources would explain a lot about how this guy kept showing up to fight another day, for one thing. Blake had just chalked it up to the local police incompetence.]

What kind of friends could a guy like that have? What do they stand to gain?

It makes sense, doesn't it? It can't be easy to make a thing like what he threatened Cherrygrove with on his own. If it were that simple, I have a friend I'm traveling with who would be all over it.

[Royce really is absolutely bored with how restricted he is... So Red doesn't doubt this.]

I don't know... But there has to be something. If it were you, why would you help him?

Yeah. That thing was a piece of shit but it must have taken a budget.

Wait a minute, you're saying your friend is up for shooting at cities with spaceships too?

[He can't quite let something like that just slip past.

But she has a good question.] The only thing a guy like that is good for is making a lot of noise. He'd make a good distraction, or just way to harass somebody who pisses you off and make them waste their time.

[He's not liking where this train of thought is leading.]

More that he's a tech nerd of the highest degree, with the smarts that I'm sure he wouldn't have minded taking a look at that sort of thing.

[Fortunately, Royce isn't the super villain type. Just the accidental "and then I broke everything" type. Which... is sort of better.]

So... He's just someone for us all to pay attention to instead of the people really rooted in, do you think?

I never trust those, either. They always think their fancy toys can solve everything.

[Don't get him started.]

If I was the kind of guy who believed in conspiracy theories, that's what I'd think. There's only one other terrorist I can think of who's been active lately.

You think this idiot is in cahoots with the mad bomber?

Play nice. It's good to have someone like that on your side, if only to identify the toys the other side has.

Maybe not exactly cahoots, but it definitely wouldn't hurt that bomber's cause if he lended a hand to this guy now and then, right? I guess there's only one way to find out.

[22] [Video/Action for Goldenrod] - "I Know a Lot About the Law and Various Other Lawyerings"

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