[20]Video/Action for Vermilion City - "How Many Illiterates Are There Here?"

[lieutenantantichrist]

[After getting a faceful of bees, sharks, and the ugliest snowflakes in creation in Celadon, Blake has moved on. He could take furious monsters from the sky, but if he had to deal with one more yuppie moron asking about his favorite boutique, he was going to clock somebody. Vermilion just has survival weirdos and muscleheads. He can live with those.

Anyway, the feed comes up on him in a library, because it was the only way to shut his lobster up.

He's sitting on a plush chair, looking sullen. Behind him, there's a table covered with books, topped by a Clauncher perusing them avidly. There's also a pile on the chair to one side of Blake. To the other side, there's his Snubbull, absorbed in some naval historical fiction.]

You know what they tell you about these little animals? They tell you what to feed them. They tell you about all the ways to fight with them.

They don't tell you that sometimes your lobster will tug on your pantleg and make whimpery noises until you take it to a damn library.

[Said lobster scuttles down from the table and clacks over, with a book on his back that he steadies with his claw. He climbs up on the chair besides Blake and deposits it on top of the pile. He looks at the untouched stack. He looks at Blake's empty hands. The stare in his eye is quiet disappointment.]

What?

[The Clauncher says nothing.

Blake sighs.] All right, all right. I'll take a look.

[He picks up a book from the pile, one that looks short, and opens it.] "Maman died today." Christ, that's cheerful. Who wants to read that kind of depressing shit?

[He tosses it aside and tries another.] "A green and yellow Chatot, which hung in a cage outside the door..." Nope, don't care about anybody's bird.

[He grabs another and opens it in the middle.] "I have heard the mermaids singing..." Yeah, sure you have buddy, I don't give a shit.

[One more, and he jabs a finger at a line at random.] "A drowsy numbness pains my sense, as though of hemlock I had drunk, or emptied some dull opiate" - the hell is this? Who wants to read about some moody junkie? They gotta have something where they talk like goddamn normal people.

[The Clauncher's antennae twitch and he perks up, getting an idea. He scuttles off and returns with a slim volume, which he sets on Blake's knee and opens to a certain page. He points at a line with his claw.

Blake picks it up for a closer look, then breaks into a smile.] Hey, that's not bad. [He looks to the screen.] Listen to this.

[He clears his throat and holds the book up dramatically. He recites,] "The first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers."

[He sets it down and gestures at the screen.] Still, I got a question.

[He spreads his hands.] What good has a book ever done anybody?

Comments

[video]

[rocketralph]

_{[Here's a sight for sore faces.]}

Huh, didn't think Pokemon were interested in culture. Maybe that's what my yellow rat needs.

[video]

[lieutenantantichrist]

[Hey, it's his old friend with the giant hams for hands.]

Most of them care more about fighting. I don't know what's got poetry into this lobster's head. Beating the shit out of other animals isn't something you need a lot of education for.

You trying to get your rat a diploma?

[video]

[rocketralph]

Sounds like you've got one sensitive shellfish on your hands.

_{[Excuse him while he grins at that horrible joke.]}

Pal, I would read her the Three Little Pigs nightly at this point to get her to behave.

[video]

[lieutenantantichrist]

Tell me about it. He's some kinda goddamn intellectual.

[Blake says the last word like it's the name of something eerie and probably poisonous that you'd find in the dark depths of the sea.]

C'mon. [Blake scoffs, figuring the guy's exaggerating.] A rat can't get into that much trouble.

[video]

[ardent]

Lieutenant Blake!

[You are getting the crispest salute ever, because god, it's been a while since he's seen you, hello!]

It's good to see that you seem to be doing well! Even if you're, ah...

[...can we find tact today...]

...not one for reading, I take it!

[#nailed it]

[video]

[lieutenantantichrist]

[Blake breaks into a rare, genuine smile.] Hey, Ishimaru! How's it going?

[He casts his gaze around the library.] Yeah, I don't really get the appeal.

[He gives a wry nod to the avidly reading blue lobster.] That doesn't stop Feli from trying to convince me.

[ardent]

It's going pretty well, actually - it's been a while!

[...That said, though.]

I don't really read much for fun, either - it's always been for studying purposes! So I guess in that regard it's useful, if nothing else.

[lieutenantantichrist]

Good to hear it. Hell, I bet you've got all your animals lining up and saluting by now. What've you been up to, anyway?

[His lip twists at the mention of studying.] That's worse. I bet it's a relief bein here and getting a break from all that crap.

[video]

[whitehairedprettyboy]

At least you appreciate the Bard, I suppose.

[ Did you order a snobby British guy? No? Well, you're getting one. ]

Though you might at least have heard of Keats. I mean, really.

[video]

[lieutenantantichrist]

I don't hear any singing.

[Oh, fuckin' hooray, some old guy with an accent.

His brows furrow.] Who?

[video]

[whitehairedprettyboy]

[ Good thing Valmont didn't hear that bit of internal dialogue. HE'S NOT OLD HE IS THIRTY-SIX okay ]

...Oh, good lord. Do you mean to tell me you haven't heard of Shakespeare either? I wasn't sure at first if you were being serious or if this was some sort of joke in very poor taste, but... [ He stares at Blake, agape. ] You really are illiterate, aren't you?

[video]

[lieutenantantichrist]

[The hair says otherwise, Grandpa.]

Of course I've heard of him, that how I know he's not a damn musician.

[He scowls.] I can fuckin' read! I just choose not to!

[video]

[enjoymyatelier]

...dear lord above, I really wonder how they make the rhyme and meter work in some of these things... if they do at all.

[He sighs pretty heavily...]

Honestly, though, I've always been more for the visual arts, myself, but putting all intellectual pursuits aside, a good book is a good way to spend an afternoon, at the very least.

[video]

[lieutenantantichrist]

Some of this shit doesn't even rhyme. [Blake sounds personally offended. He doesn't even like this poetry crap, but it's supposed to have rules to it, goddammit.]

There's a whole lot of better things out there to do than stare at a book...Visual arts? You mean you're some kinda painter, Archie?

[video]

[enjoymyatelier]

Ah, yes, free verse. Also known as "I know nothing about rhyme or meter, but I hope these words sound nice."

Well, certainly, but in some cases it's just what one wants to do. There are better things out there to do than watching a decent show that ultimately turns out to be extremely disappointing on account of its complete lack of an ending, after all.

[HE STILL HASN'T FORGIVEN YOU FOR THAT DVD SET]

And yes, though I'm also fond of sculpture and crafts, as well.

[video]

[lieutenantantichrist]

[Blake doesn't entirely know the details of what you're talking about but shares wholeheartedly in your scorn.] Yeah, dumb assholes.

[He breaks into a big old grin.] Ahh, you watched the whole thing! C'mon, the shitty ending's half the fun. [That is, inflicting it on somebody else.]

Wait a minute, crafts? You do macrame and weave baskets?

[video;]

[aufsassig]

Haha, you know what's a great read? "A Modest Proposal."

It's funny as hell to watch people who don't understand satire get all up in arms about a guy "advocating seriously" for eating babies.

[video;]

[lieutenantantichrist]

[Confusion wrinkles Blake's brow.] What the hell is that satiring? People who eat adults?

[video;]

[aufsassig]

It was some kind of classism thing, I think. Making fun of the holier-than-thou elites who treated the average working guy like shit.

It's basically like "Hey, why bother doing anything about overpopulation or food shortages or giving people a decent wage or living conditions? We can solve 'em all at once by just starting to eat babies and paying people a good price for 'em."

[Video]

[wing_attack]

... Well, books let you go to places you can't go to. They can help you learn how to think, and to describe things. For a kid without much TV access they're pretty much the best way to pass your time.

['Sup Blake and Felix.]

[Video]

[lieutenantantichrist]

[Oh, the young man who shared a poem! From his place in the background, Felix waves a friendly claw.]

What good is sitting around and thinking? Doing shit is how you learn. You can read a hundred books about weightlifting, they won't build your arms up any.

[Blake puts some thought into it.] And if you're stuck somewhere, reading some guy talking about how great these places you'll never get to go are, that's gotta just make it worse.

[Video]

[wing_attack]

Well... yeah. But if someone doesn't show you how, then how are you going to know? Words have saved my behind more times than you could imagine. Taking my way out of problems when there's no way of fighting my way out... sometimes I wish it worked more often.

... And, well. It's not the same, no. But you can at least picture it. It's better than nothing. I used to draw things from books all the time.

video;

[majorcrotchgrab]

Your Clauncher is very unusual for a Pokemon. I don't think I've met any quite as... sophisticated as yours.

[He's telling the truth. That thing is a fucking genius compared to most.]

As for books, I'm guessing you don't have a very active imagination, do you?

video;

[lieutenantantichrist]

He's a weirdo all right. [He gets a momentary peeved look from the crustacean. Felix heard that.] He says he read a lot back in the ocean, too, but here there's a lot more that aren't about kelp.

[He crosses his arms.] Imagination's for little kids and guys on the street corner yelling about pink elephants. I've done fine without one.

video;

[majorcrotchgrab]

I didn't realize fish had literature...

[Raikov purses his lips.]

How boring. You did strike me as the uncreative type but I had hoped I was just misjudging you. No wonder you're so miserable all the time.