Lt. Carter Blake (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
lieutenantantichrist) wrote2013-02-04 02:35 pm
lieutenantantichrist) wrote2013-02-04 02:35 pm
IC Contact
"Carter Blake. What do you want?"
"Carter Blake. What do you want?"
"Carter Blake. What do you want?"
"Carter Blake. What do you want?"
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked];
Being the ray of sunshine that he is, there's a lot of things in this world that Yusuke hates with every fiber of his being: hiking; his teachers; the fact that he's stuck in this saccharine bullshit dimension playing babysitter to a bunch of weird monsters when he could be back home doing everything he'd promised himself he'd do after he let those SDF tools boot him out of the living world. The thing that's eating at him the most right now, though, is what happened to Shaun. He hates that someone chose to hurt Shaun the way that they did. He hates that it messed up Shaun's birthday (kids should look forward to their birthdays, dammit, that's how it's supposed to be). More than that, he hates that he can't do anything about it. Sure, he can get pissed off about it and skulk around Mahogany Town until he finds a gym with punching bags and weight equipment instead of giant ice monsters (which, incidentally, is exactly what he does a few minutes after he gets off the phone with Shaun), but he can't change what happened to him or magically make it all better for him. No matter how badly he wants to.
He tries to put it out of his mind for now. Spends a couple hours at the gym, smacking the crap out of one of the punching bags. It's a small place - not very fancy, but functional, and completely vacant at this hour of the night save for Yusuke and his Altaria, who watches him worriedly from the corner where he'd dumped all his stuff. There are mats on one side of the room and electric fans that look and sound like they were installed centuries ago on the ceiling, and something about both of them strikes Yusuke as familiar, though he can't quite put a finger on why. He doesn't give it a lot of thought, at any rate - just tries to focus on the quick repetitive movements of his fists striking the punching bag, and not on the little kid who deserved a better lot in life than the one he'd received.
It doesn't work. After pummeling the punching bag until his knuckles are red and raw and the sweat that's sprung up under his shirt has caused the fabric to cling to him like a particularly slimy leech, he finds himself still consumed with the thought of how infuriatingly unfair everything that's happened to Shaun has been. As Yusuke takes slow, unsteady steps away from the punching bag and flexes his sore fingers, he furrows his brow and tries to think. There's got to be something - something he can do for Shaun that isn't just telling him that he's there for him and reassuring him whenever he needs it. It's not that he isn't happy to do that for him or anything - hell, he'd stay up all night doing just that if he had to. But he's used to being able to do more than that for the people he cares about. He's used to being able to protect them.
Yusuke stills. A bead of sweat trickles down the side of his neck as realization steadily dawns on him. That's it, he thinks, a rush of energy surging up his spine. After spending the last... he doesn't even know how many hours weighed down by anger and exhaustion, he feels recharged and motivated. He knows what he has to do now. All he needs now is the information necessary to do it - and he knows exactly who to call for that.
It's a conversation he's been meaning to have with the old man for months now, anyway. Might as well have it now.
It's close to midnight when Blake gets the video message. It's private, locked down tight; Yusuke doesn't know how significant the chances of other people seeing this are, but he doesn't wanna risk it anyway. Yusuke is sweaty and disheveled, but his eyes are bright and his jaw is set with determination. If Blake pays enough attention, he might recognize the gym Yusuke's standing in - after all, he himself was there not too long along.]
Hey, Blake. You awake? I need to talk to you about something.
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked];
The great thing about a place like this, where people are always going back and forth, is it's easy to pick up a short-term lease. In one day, out the next to drag your ass through the grass and set your dog on whatever freaks come out. It's just a side effect that nothing ever feels like home.
Better than hotel rooms. Christ, nothing makes you want to shoot yourself in the fucking head like a hotel room.
1/13/2001. That's the date that was typed up on the file, first on fresh bright paper and then wrinkled and smudged as it got handled and pawed over a hundred times, spotted with the water that always ended up dripping everywhere when you didn't have the damn time to dry off.
It doesn't matter. The case is long over, and it has nothing to do with him anymore. Long past time to forget about it. So he'll forget about it.
For the fourth time or so in the past hour, he goes back up to the top article.
The buzz of his phone makes him jolt. He grips it and thumbs it on.]
Do you have any idea what time it is--
[He's halfway through bitching when he notices who it is. Notices the weight machines and familiar flaked paint on the wall behind him, too. His expression wends away from irritation toward intrigue.
Blake,, not old man.]
What's going on, kid?
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked];
I got off the phone with Shaun a couple hours ago. Shaun Mars.
[Yusuke doubts the clarification there was necessary, but he wants to make absolutely sure that Blake knows who exactly he's talking about before he continues. His voice is clear and firm. It's obvious he means business.]
I need to talk to you about what happened to him. About his kidnapping.
You know about it, don't you?
[Something about the way Yusuke asks that question suggests that he already knows the answer. A cop from the same city and the same world as Shaun, who met Shaun's dad but never met Shaun himself until they both ended up here - that's too much of a coincidence to be a coincidence. Blake had to have been working the case. What other explanation could there be?]
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked];
He doesn't know why Yusuke's asking this out of nowhere, but it's a complicated question with a simple answer.]
That's none of your damn business. It's over, and it has nothing to do with you.
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked];
Still. It'll take a hell of a lot more than that to deter him.]
... Listen, I didn't call you up to try and badger you into spillin' all the details. Hell, I wouldn't be gettin' in your face about it all of the sudden in the first place if I wasn't trying to look out for Shaun.
I just wanna know more about the guy who did it. Y'know, in case he shows up here. If there's a chance that somebody with the motivation to hurt Shaun could turn up in this world, I wanna know as much as possible about him so that if he does show his ugly mug around here, I can make sure he doesn't get anywhere close to Shaun. Or to any of the other kids here.
[If the son of a bitch responsible for kidnapping Shaun had it in him to abduct and try to murder one kid, there's no doubt in Yusuke's mind he'd be capable of doing that to other kids too. Death might not be possible in this world, but that doesn't mean he's gonna let some mental case put kids in danger. He'd sooner have the bastard come at him than let that happen.]
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked];
The fact that the brat has a point only pulls the hot cord around his throat tighter.
His voice is a taut growl.] That's not going to happen.
[The killer is a dark place his brain routes around. He's not going there right now, god damn it. It's like being punched out of nowhere by somebody without even the decency to tap you on the shoulder first. You can't just waltz up and pull him into this. Who the hell do you think you are?
Five minutes ago, Blake had been doing just fine. Memories don't bother him as long as some asshole doesn't come dredging them up.
The lines on his face are carved deep by the reading lamp's dim glow, making him look like an old, wary animal disturbed in its den.]
I said drop it.
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked];
... Then again, Yusuke says to himself, trying to shake loose the vague sense of unease that's beginning to creep up on him. He did kind of come at Blake out of nowhere with some pretty personal questions, so hell, maybe it isn't so odd that Blake's shutting him down. The idea of not getting any of the answers he wanted frustrates him, but he knows what it's like to not want to discuss a case. He's only been avoiding talking about the last one he was on for the past six months.
A beat of silence passes. Yusuke mulls over his next course of action for a moment, then decides that he better respect Blake's wishes. That feeling of uncertainty is niggling at him still, but he does his best to ignore it. After all, it's probably nothing.]
Okay. All right. Consider it dropped. I get it, I shouldn't've shoved my nose into your business. It's just...
[He tips his head back a little as he draws in a breath, letting it out again seconds later through puffed cheeks. He tries not to think back to that day outside the Olivine Lighthouse, when Shaun first confided in him about the kidnapping, but the image of Shaun sitting next to him looking small and sad and scared propels to the forefront of his mind anyway, plastering itself there like flypaper. That's all it takes to get him venting; the words spill out of him before he gets a chance to stop them, and they're laced with frustration.]
It's just I was thinking about everything Shaun's told me about what happened to him and I got pissed off 'cause I can't do anything to change it! I know that sounds stupid, but it sucks that a kid his age has to live with something like that. I thought that maybe if I could make sure he doesn't get hurt like that again I'd be doin' somethin' useful, but--
[His mouth twists. A crease forms between his brow as he closes his eyes, trying to cobble together some semblance of composure. For a second, he looks deeply troubled. Then his eyes open again, and in that instant, his expression smooths out and hardens, like nothing was ever amiss. He swipes away some of the sweat beneath his chin with the back of his free hand and shrugs. He looks tired.]
Anyway. It doesn't matter. I'm sorry I brought it up.
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked];
It's almost surprising when he does.
Blake lets out a long exhalation that doesn't do much to release the tension in his bones. He can still feel the thing behind him, and its rattling breath on his neck.
Fuck, he feels old.
That's all his voice sounds like, as he falls back from the brink of something ugly. Old and tired.] Look, just forget it. Don't grill the kid about it, either. It's all dead and buried.
[He thinks that's going to be the end of it, when Yusuke says those two words that mean something important is coming: It's just.
All he says is a perfectly reasonable consideration, things that would occur to anybody who cares about the kid and that they'd want to know about. All honest, with the kind of straightforward willingness to admit he gives a damn that a teenager like Yusuke almost never shows.
Every single word hits Blake like an accusation.
Rapidfire, he bites out,] Nobody could've changed it, goddammit! It wasn't my fault!
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked];
...
What?
At first, Yusuke is so startled he doesn't know what to say. He opens his mouth. Closes it. Then, looking more and more baffled by the second, he says:]
Uh... yeah, I - didn't say it was.
[What the hell? Yusuke stares at Blake, searching. Where did that come from? He takes a second to go over everything he'd just told Blake in his head, and feels unsettled and confused when he eventually concludes that nothing he'd said could reasonably be construed as accusatory. He doesn't understand why Blake said that. "It wasn't my fault"... well, yeah, duh. Of course it wasn't Blake's fault. He was trying to save Shaun back when it happened, wasn't he?
Wasn't he?]
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked];
Why didn't you stop him, Lieutenant?
His hand is gripping the tabletop, putting white into well-used knuckles.
His voice grates like rocks grinding against one another.] It shouldn't have been him. So leave me the fuck alone.
[It echoes in the silent room. All the animals are put away and he's alone, locked in by the snow.]
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked];
Hey, whoa. C'mon, old man, what's--
[What's with you? is what he's about to ask. But then the memory of that day outside the lighthouse slams back into his mind's eye, sharp and forceful enough that it takes the air out of his lungs and makes him flinch like he'd been physically struck, and suddenly, he goes very, very still.
He remembers that day clearly, even now. The heat from the sun beating down on the back of his neck. The smell of the ocean in the air. And Shaun, curled up into a ball on the bench next to him, mumbling into his knees in a voice almost too quiet to be heard.
"He was dressed as a police officer."
Yusuke's stomach drops. His expression drops with it. His face is ashen as he stares at Blake with a look that can only be described as stark horror.]
No way...
[Yusuke's voice is trembling. He feels sick. Holy shit, all this time...]
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked];
Then, visible even in the little square of the screen, something comes over the kid's face that makes his stomach turn.]
Wait. Christ.
[He's been around Shaun a lot. There's no telling...
His hand closes around the phone and brings it up near the urgent, sharp look on his face.]
What did he tell you?
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked];
("I did a bad thing, kid, and I'm out of excuses.")
--and fuck, fuck, he can't believe he felt bad for him, he can't believe he talked to him and tried to help him and let him make him think he was someone he could trust. Blake had said that whatever it was he'd done had involved a kid, and when Yusuke focuses on the facts and not on how utterly furious and disgusted and betrayed he feels, he realizes, with a bitter feeling in his chest, that only an idiot would've taken this long to figure out which kid he was talking about.
There's no time to kick himself for it though, because now Blake's asking him what Shaun told him with a look on his face like he knows he's screwed, and you know what, Yusuke might be an idiot, but he's an idiot who just found all the answers he'd been looking for when he'd called Blake, and if Blake thinks he'll be able to squirrel away from him now, he's got another fucking thing coming.]
Something about the man who kidnapped him.
[Yusuke's voice is low and cold. He looks Blake right in the eye and tells him:]
He said the guy was dressed like a cop.
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked];
[It's exactly what Blake was afraid of.
You live with your failure every day. It's an old friend by your shoulder, always waiting for you to turn and catch a glimpse at one of those moments when you think you're okay. It's a knife that's been used a thousand times.
Having it jabbed at him one more time shouldn't hurt fresh.
Blake's gotten plenty of looks full of hatred and revulsion in his time, too. From hookers, drug dealers, drunks trying to heave bricks through car windows, all walks of life. Scumbags sneering at him like he was the wife-beating lowlife. The unfairness of it always made his blood boil.
He doesn't have that to protect him now.
Yusuke knows.
Behind him something drips, like the shambling, wheezing creature from a nightmare a long, long time ago. It's the faucet.
That stare is the sort of bone-deep hatred only a kid is capable of. Blake recognizes it. Yusuke's older and from the wrong side of the world, but for a second in this light, he looks like Shaun.
For all the punk pain in the ass the kid is, there's something strong and good in him, you can't help but see it. That part is exactly what's standing there and despising Blake for how he'd failed.
Blake rubs his eyes with his thumb and forefinger. God, he's tired.]
Nobody ever could've seen it coming. It was against all the evidence...even fucking common sense.
[What a weak, pathetic voice.
He looks at the screen, hollow-eyed.]
I fucked up, all right?
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked];
When what he gets instead is honesty, his expression spasms. It takes more effort than he'd like to twist it back into the same ugly glare he'd been wearing before. He feels like he ought to feel relieved that Blake spared him the crap, but instead, the frankness of the old man's words sting like a blow to the face. Fuck, he's so angry, so angry that he let himself get tricked into thinking this son of a bitch was his friend, but he can't think about that right now. After all, this isn't about him.]
You think saying that's enough to make it better?
[His lip curls. The hand at his side curls too, into a tight fist he wishes he could use to beat Blake into the dirt. His stomach hurts. He doesn't realize he's shaking.]
You bastard. How the hell could you do that to a kid?
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked];
I didn't do anything.
[Yeah Carter, that's the problem, he hears Jayden jeer in his head.
He grabs the phone and looks at Yusuke with desperation in his eye, as though this kid can absolve him.] You think there was ever a second I didn't spend trying to get the kid out of there?
[His hand rakes through his hair, and there's few things in the world as well-worn as his excuses.]
I couldn't stop him. I couldn't've known.
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked];
[Yusuke's voice rips through the air as something inside of him suddenly snaps like a rubber band. He's screaming now, glowering into the screen with a wild look in his eyes. His muscles are sore and his feet ache from all those hours he spent venting his spleen on that punching bag, but the sheer amount of adrenaline and rage coursing through him right now makes the discomfort feel distant, inconsequential compared to the way every nerve in his entire body is buzzing.]
You know, if there's one thing I hate about guys like you, it's how you always act like you're the victim when you know damn well the only victims here are the people you decided to mess with! Don't lie to me, you sick son of a bitch. You knew exactly what you were doing, and if you think it makes any difference to me whether you had second thoughts or feel bad about it now, you're dead wrong!
[He should've known, he should've fucking known Blake would pull something like this. Behind him, something makes a small noise and brushes against his elbow. He wrenches his arm away, not even having to look to know that it's Puu coming to try to calm him down. Sorry, buddy. Now isn't the time.]
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked];
In the interrogation room, Mars hadn't even claimed he was innocent. He had never looked mad or afraid, just dazed and tired. Some people have guilt written all over their face. You know it when you see it, like art.
He liked the ache in his knuckles, and the satisfaction of being the one willing to make the hard choices and do the right thing.
He thought he knew Yusuke, thought he was building some kind of grudging respect despite it all. And here he is, calling him a son of a bitch. And he's not wrong.
Like the kid said. Sorry doesn't bring his dad back.
His voice grates like a chunk of metal dragged over concrete.]
There's decisions you only have a split second to make. Ones lives depend on. Everybody else has all the time in the world to say why you were wrong. Then you live with it.
I did what I thought I had to do.
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked];
[God. Yusuke shakes his head and scrubs a hand over his face, a chuckle rattling its way out of his throat. There's no humor in the sound - only bitter disbelief. To think he'd grown to trust this asshole...
Whatever. It doesn't matter, Yusuke decides fiercely, trying to ignore the sick feeling in the pit of his stomach and the ache in his chest as he sets his jaw and looks at Blake again. His gaze is hard, his lips pressed into a thin line. He's not yelling anymore, but the anger is still there in his voice - and so is the contempt.]
Funny. None of the split-second decisions I've had to make were ever about whether or not I wanted to commit to drowning a little kid.
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked];
[It was all a matter of time, anyway. He had to find out sooner or later, and what did Blake think was going to happen? That somebody who cared about Shaun and who'd seen how the kid's face crumpled into fear and hate when Blake was in the same hemisphere, that he'd say aw well everybody makes mistakes when he found out why?
He'd like to be able to say it's not fair.
Two years away from home has worn down the good, self-righteous anger that use to protect him from anybody who had the gall to think they could have done better. Right now, he's just tired.
When he was drunk off his ass on New Year's Eve, Yusuke brought him water.
He's reaching for the button to shut the phone off.] Goodb-
[Wait.
That's strange.
It hits his stomach first, a tight, sinking sensation that something is wronger than he could have imagined.
It takes a long second for the world in his head to reorient to what Yusuke means.
He's immobile. A word comes out like the breath you lose when you take a hit.]
What?
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked];
... What, you didn't hear me, old man?
[He huffs derisively. Well, all right then. Fine. His expression dark, Yusuke looks Blake right in the eye and tells him, slowly and clearly so that he's sure he'll understand:]
I said that unlike you, I've never gambled with the life of a kid. You think you can look me in the face and lecture me about making life or death decisions when the one you made involved someone you were trying to kill? Someone that people like us are supposed to protect?
You've got some fucking nerve.
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked];
You think I was the Origami Killer.
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked];
Not after all he's heard.
Yusuke's gaze doesn't waver as he responds. His voice is cold.]
If by that you mean I think you tried to murder Shaun, then yeah.
I do.
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked];
[His hand slams down on the table with a force that makes it jump and the impact reverberate up through his arm, and the coals that have been choking him burst into life and it turns into a roar that smashes the cold silence of the night.] You stupid little shit!
[He could handle the usual guilt but this is something else. This is betrayal.
Him the killer, him standing over little kids as they pleaded for help and the cold waters rose up. Him responsible for the small sheet-covered bodies in the rain.
He yanks the phone toward his face and snarls directly into it.]
I never hurt any little kid, and fuck you for ever thinking I would!
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked];
Okay, so if it wasn't you, then how do you explain all that shit you said when I asked you who the kidnapper was?! Huh?! "It wasn't my fault" -- what, you just decided to throw that out there, or are you just feeding me crap 'cause you know that if I EVER see your face in person again, I'll make you wish this fucking freak show of a dimension was Hell!
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked]; HEAVY RAIN SPOILERS
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked]; HEAVY RAIN SPOILERS
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked]; HEAVY RAIN SPOILERS
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked]; HEAVY RAIN SPOILERS
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked]; HEAVY RAIN SPOILERS
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked]; HEAVY RAIN SPOILERS
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked]; HEAVY RAIN SPOILERS
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked]; HEAVY RAIN SPOILERS
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked]; HEAVY RAIN SPOILERS
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked]; HEAVY RAIN SPOILERS
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked]; HEAVY RAIN SPOILERS
backdated to 1/13 | video [locked]; HEAVY RAIN SPOILERS